i can take the fact that i got burned.

"and i don't wanna know if there's another part of me,

don't wanna feel if i'm alive...

just wanna walk away from the ashes 

and take the fact that i got burned 

and baby, let you know i'm still standin', if you miss it again, miss it again"

'ships in a bottle'--butch walker

is it possible to be consumed by a song? because that is how i feel when i listen to this song. i feel attatched to every line of the song. i have listened to it constantly on repeat for the past week and i still cannot get enough. my heart hurts so much, in more ways than one. i think that is why i feel so connected to this song. that and the fact that it's butch. [i'm dying to hear sycamore meadows in its entirety. if it's anything like his live show, i can't imagine it much short of perfection. i don't even know how i became so infatuated with everything that man does.] but i'm hurting and i just don't know what to do. i don't know what to say. i don't know who to talk to. i feel so alone and so stuck. right now, God's the only one i can count on, which i'm fine with, but i'm still hurting. i feel like the some of the good parts of my life are being taken away from me and i just don't know how to stop it. maybe i'm melodramatic. maybe i'm just angsty. i don't know. i think i just need a shoulder right now. everything will be fine, it will always be fine. but right now it's just too much. but i'll be okay. i have faith. i've just got to have faith.

today is the start of something new. 

let's see how this goes.